wastroyed

i was waiting for some rude geezer to open the door
but a stunning beauty said hello to me in a teal voice and invited me in.
i was... i was... or was i? i was speechless. she gave me a tomato.
what am i supposed to do with this, asked i.
alas, thou must insert it into thine anal cavity, deep and slow, said she.
i declined.

what learned we from this atrocity?
what horror must a man experience until one can call him a proper man?
why was a lady of high proportions instructing me in such a savage way?
who is i?
who is tee scott (or rather, was)?